Is your teen daughter starting to feel unreachable? Does she seem overly anxious and worried? Will she venture down the wrong path or start hanging with the wrong crowd? These are some of the toughest questions we face as parents. We want so badly to see our daughters succeed. And to enjoy a degree of peace in our last years with them before they head off to college.
The thing is, while you're cooking up hopes and aspirations for your daughter, her beautiful mind is trying to answer one simple question: Am I enough? This question is the leading cause of anxiety, depression, eating disorders and a host of challenges that your daughter may potentailly be struggling with now.
When I was a graduate student at UCLA, I had the opportunity to chat with Arianna Huffington. She offered this unforgettable advice: "we must never forget that whoever controls the language, holds the power."
Language , the words we feed ourselves, the social labels we identify with, the stories we make up, all dictate how much power we have. Quite honestly, most teen girls are functioning on a bedrock of lies. They're living fragmented realities that are highly influenced by the thoughts and opinions of their peer group, the media, even their parents. It's hard (even for adults) to know "who they are" through the noise of social influence.
The LDS series teaches young girls how to feel comfortable in their own skin. They learn how to pursue dreams that are bigger than themselves, and how to cope with the daily grind of criticism, peer pressure and performance anxiety. Throughout the program the girls will:
"Tamika was very helpful with my daughter. She found her very relatable and a good sounding block for teen social issues. She helped turn her around. I would highly recommend her."
It's a fact that serotonin levels rise in women (young and older) when they feel connected to a community. Research shows that when girls talk about their feelings with someone who genuinely cares, it stimulates the production of serotonin thereby increasing their overall feeling of contentment and relaxation. Social exclusion is one of the most emotionally damaging things a girl can experience. Therefore weeks one and two will be focused on:
*Establishing a safe and judgement free zone
*Practicing honest and open communication
*Exploring personal goals and values
*Learning how to make requests with power and intention
*Cleaning the friendship closet
*Exploring helpful vs. toxic friendships and how to tack action without social humiliation
We all live with insecurities deep in our bellies. Where does it come from and how does it shape the way we see ourselves and others? Together we'll explore:
*The critic in the mirror. Who is she? What does she tell us? How can we educate and free her?
*What it means to "fit in" and the difference between pursing "power" versus "popularity"
*Overcoming thoughts that keep us stuck and afraid
*The Shine Theory and how to love the competition
*The CALM method for dealing with bullies
*Self-compassion and self-soothing techniques
*The importance of service, gratitude and global awareness
By now the girls have gained more clarity and confidence. They're ready to go a little deeper. This week is all about:
*Setting personal and academic goals that are clear, measurable, and achievable
*Defining individual terms for success - what does it look and feel like
*Learning time-management and goal-tracking tools
*Developing practices for avoiding burnout
*Developing a growth versus outcome mindset
*Accountability and partnership
MORE PRAISE FROM A MOM:
"Your emotional investment in my daughter and I is so appreciated and healing. I am so open to your gift of knowledge. I thank you with all of my heart and soul for all you've done for us." Elizabeth J.
"Omg where do I begin? Tamika is the best. I get so excited every time I see her. She gives great advice and really does care for her clients. I am so lucky to know a wonderful soul like Tamika."